Featured performance
💥 Best line: In relationships I offer cover for emotional damage. excess applies, claim approved. I'll do it later.
I work in insurance, as if my whole personality is small print for promises I won't honour.
"This person says I'll do it later like it is a project plan for procrastination." That person is me.
I treat watching football like a personality trait. I've got season tickets to avoiding chores.
I check my phone constantly, planning like a CEO, doing as much as a screensaver.
In relationships I offer cover for emotional damage. excess applies, claim approved. I'll do it later.
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